Dammit, Nelson.
I know Annie Mourusie already said this in a past post, but you taught us that art is theft and I should be one of your favorites.
I should be one of those revered writers who sounds excruciatingly indie. Something like, "There is dirt between my ribs, but you grew sunflowers with the curve of your lips." It doesn't make any sense and it feels impersonal, but it's a great visual I'm sure.
Honestly, I don't care if my writing isn't that good, I really don't. (Liar.) But the fact that I've stayed in Paris--even after my visa expired--should be enough.
Dammit, Nelson.
You're only a high school teacher.
It should matter that my professor asked for a copy of my film analysis paper. Like, that's the important stuff, right? It was about Pride and Prejudice and love and it was beautiful. I think.
But she never told me if it was a good example or a bad example or an it-could-have-been-better-but-it's-definitely-acceptable example.
And I still would have gotten a greater feeling if I had made your favorite blogs list.
I'm sorry, Nelson.
This post is an absolute mess, but so is my blog and I thought they should match. (Would I have made your list if I had made my blog pretty?)
I'm sorry that my music plays without you asking it to and I'm sorry that I dropped an F-bomb in my intro.
But I'm trying to make a career out of this writing thing and I need some sort of second impression and a first validation. Because everyone notices my brother as a writer and my friend as a writer, and I just want to be noticed as a writer.
Really, I'm still in Paris because I'm waiting for someone to tell me that I'm doing this right.
I'm sorry, Nelson.
I'm still here because this is the rest of my life.
- S.H.
"I'm still here because this is the rest of my life."
ReplyDeleteI just love you and I wish more people realized you're as great of a writer as I think you are because honestly most of the things I write I couldn't do without you as a major part of my inspiration.
You are so good to me. (Also, thanks for being sometimes the only person to comment on my posts.) I'm your biggest fan.
DeleteAhhh yes. I loved this. Let's all stop caring about the "Hall of Fame" and Nelson's blog list, and start nurturing ourselves, because isn't that why we started to write in the first place? You know what I think makes a good post/blog? Honesty. You know what this had? Honesty.
ReplyDeleteBut ya know, why does it matter what I think? I don't know...
This is a rambling comment to say I liked this. I reeeallly like this.
Sorry to be awkward and comment twice, but let's start a revolution of Paris, where we all leave Paris to find ourselves, which is awkward, because that's why we came to Paris in the first place, but Paris is almost becoming COMMERCIALIZED.
ReplyDeleteThis is a good and a bad idea all at once, so I'm just going to stop thinking about it and be quiet.
You're doing this right.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could validate you. If I had a stamp, I would give it to you, I promise. But it would just be from a high school teacher.
I would like that stamp a whole lot. This is definitely good enough. You're important. I don't think I would have chosen my career without your class.
DeleteI'm just glad I'm not the only one who needs Nelson to validate me, even after I've graduated and done some pretty great things.
ReplyDelete